Sunday, January 2, 2011

New Year, New Day, Same Hope, Faith and Dreams !

Can't believe that  last date I posted on this blog was June . So many memories been made, days of laughter and tears since then. I stopped blogging for few different reasons. But, the main reason being that I just didn't know how to put into words all the jumbled feelings that I was having. I would sit and stare at the computer screen, wanting so badly to pour out my heart , then would get angry at myself . What did I have to feel sad about..I was not the one in pain, the one that had to endure the terrible healing process of liver surgery. Not the one to once again struggle with the horrors of cancer ! I didn't want to take one moment away from Kylee's healing journey...she is the one that has had to endure it. But my sister said something to me last night that really hit home...She said but Deb, you have a different story to tell. Yes, I do have a story, we all do. Mine is a story of a mother's pain and fear of seeing her child go through the past 2 years battling cancer. ..It's a long story and to many emotions to go into at this time. This blog post is just to give reason to why I have not blogged for months and to encourage all to tell their story. To share is human, we all suffer in one way or another. Sharing makes the suffering easier some how...we all need to believe that we matter. That someone cares, understands or can relate to our lives.
Many people suffer in silence, behind closed doors, alone. They get up in the morning, put on their happy face and lead others to believe that their lives are prefect..Well no ones life is prefect, no person is prefect and we all feel sadness, fear and alone at times... I don't want to feel that way, I don't want you to feel that way..If I open my door , let you see my imperfections, my humanness than maybe it will help others to do the same...
So starting tomorrow, I will be blogging about my 21 day Raw Food Detox journey, fears, sadness, happiness or other emotions that I encounter through my day.. Well maybe not everything :) I am so far from prefect that at times I lose myself in the imperfections!
I'm 52 years old, raised two beautiful daughters, been married for 32 years...Been at my oldest daughters side for past 2 years while she has battled cancer...been too far away from my youngest daughter, lost a job that provided much needed income to my household....which has led to many other changes in my life..BUT...guess what .... I still laugh, love, dream !! Have hope, faith and believe that my story is worth writing...regardless if others read, learn, or dare to tell their story.. I've paid my dues..I am woman now here me Roar :)


ADO said...

Well said are a strong, wise woman. And brave...21 days!! you go girl!

Laurie at Turner Farm said...

Debbie, so happy to see you back! Beautiful post! Love it and LOVE you!